Oh god... the circus conference of E3 is about to start... Every year, they do something ridiculous or try so hard to be funny... Will that be the case for 2016? Let's see, shall we?
Yep... They have people dancing in stupid costumes... This has to be for Just Dance. More people are coming on stage in even more ridiculous costumes. I got to admit, though, at least Ubisoft tries to have fun with their conferences. And yes, there's a guy with a butterfly guitar.
And... OH NO NOT HER AGAIN! Aisha Tyler... *groans* I love her stand up, but she always makes me cringe EVERY YEAR! Comedians and press conferences just don't mix with me. She and Ubisoft offer their condolences and thoughts and prayers for the victims of Orlando. Good for them! Yup, all the dancing was for Just Dance 2017.
SHE MADE A WOOD JOKE! *hangs self* Then, she mocks the French. They seem to take it in stride. Also, it's Ubisoft's 30th birthday. Happy birthday! Finally, she introduces a game! It's Ghost Recon: Wildlands. The cinematic shows that it's going to be on an island jungle setting. Possibly fighting a drug cartel.
Dominic Butler comes out to talk about the game. It takes place in Bolivia, and yup, they'll be fighting drug lords at the source where the coca leaf is grown. The game will be open world with a solo campaign or with four player co-op. They also claim it's the largest open world they've ever made. Another video is shown, this time showing off some gameplay. It looks nice, and the landscape is vast, but so far, nothing mind blowing. It looks this is four player co-op. They start off at different positions and then reconvene at the enemy base. There's a drone they send out to mark targets. After trying to sneak around to get the target, he spots them and bolts. Now it's a full on vehicle chase. This is actually starting to look pretty intense and fun right now. One guy was on a motorcycle and then got into a helicopter and now there's a firefight between two trucks. After they forced the target off the road, they pulled him out of the truck and got in the helicopter. Mission successful. March 7th 2017 is the release date.
A new trailer is being played now, showing off cryptic messages, dystopian scenarios and even a city engulfed in flames. I was thinking it might have been a game like Watch Dogs, but as it turns out... it's a South Park game, the Fractured But Whole Jason Schroeder of Ubisoft San Francisco comes out to talk about it. The game sounds like it's going to feature Cartmann and his friends as their superhero alter egos. Matt Stone and Trey Parker come out to talk with Jason. They say the story takes place after The Stick of Truth, which I never got around to playing, so that's something I need to rectify. They show off the game now, and it looks EXACTLY like a South Park episode. The footage was showing how the game sets up the character to choose its class. Wow, the writing is so funny for something so basic as setting up your character. I have to get this game already! The writing continues to entertain when Cartmann sets up the new kid's back story. They're showing off the actual gameplay now. It looks like it's still an RPG, but it lets you move around while taking your turns. and well, there's this fart time altering mechanic... cuz yeah, South Park. Also, you get Stick of Truth for free if you pre-purchase Fractured But Whole. I might have to do that. And... I did that.
It will be released on December 6th. They leave to a trailer playing. It so makes fun of all the superhero movies and even a Netflix tie-in. I can't wait to play this!
Aisha Tyler takes the stage to talk about the Division: Underground. I honestly don't care about the Division so I'm going to skip this part.
Tyler is now talking about VR and a game Eagle Flight. Three people Charles Huteau, Palmer Luckey and Jason Holtman come out demonstrate the game. There are like six different people all with Occulus head sets on. To be honest, they all look ridiculous. The game itself doesn't look all that impressive. Of course, I'm sure the effect of VR is lost unless you're actually wearing them. Doesn't look exciting to me, so in interest of time, I'm skipping this.
Aisha Tyler comes out again. She introduces Ubisoft Red Storm's David Votypka. He's talking about VR again. A video is shown for a Star Trek game. It has some Star Trek actors like Levar Burton to test out this new Star Trek game. They're showing them more than they are the actual game, so... skipping this.
A cinematic trailer is now being shown. A giant earthquake is breaking everything up. The world is a wasteland now. A few warriors are fighting each other. It shows generations of soldiers fighting from viking to samurai to knight. The trailer was for a game called For Honor. Jason Vandenberghe of Ubisoft Montreal comes out to talk about the game. This guy is INTO his presentation. Another trailer is shown. A fleet of vikings attempt to raid a samurai fortress. Now it shows some gameplay. The main character is running through battle with things blowing up near him. He's hacking and slashing with a giant ax. The melee combat looks, I dunno, slow. It's brutal, but it doesn't look very fun to me. Now he's scaling the fortress wall dodging things being thrown down on him. Killing some guards, ramming some off the ledges, then a boss fight with a samurai where he hacks him to death. February 14th 2017 is the day.
Aisha Tyler introduces Pete Young of Ubisoft Reflections to talk about a game called Grow Up, a sequel to Grow Home. A trailer plays and shows a robot flying around a uniquely stylized world. The game comes out in August.
Tyler once more. Some weird WWE style introduction for a couple guys in funky jump suits. They talk about a love child between Trials and Blood Dragon called Trials of the Blood Dragon. The trailer is bonkers, doing a mock 80s toy commercial.
Tyler brings Frank Marshal to talk about the Assassin's Creed movie. Skipping.
Aisha Tyler talks about the next game to be shown where she's interrupted by a hacked signal showing nothing other than Dedsec of Watch Dogs 2. Johnathan Morin comes out to talk about the game. The character Marcus Holloway walks the streets of San Francisco hacking random things. He meets up with a Dedsec guy to plan out a mission. Marcus is on a lift and he flips out a drone to do some recon. I'm actually not really that impressed with what I'm seeing. He actually put his earbuds in and Rakim's Don't Sweat the Technique is playing for mood music. He used a little RC vehicle to to do something to a computer, and now there's combat going on. I love the melee weapon he uses, the billiard ball and rope. He hacked what he wanted to, and now he's fleeing the building using parkour and makes his escape by ziplining off the building. It was a cool demo, but at the end of day, seems pretty typical of these kind of games.
Tyler now introduces Yves Guillemot to talk more about Watch Dogs 2. He brings out Jim Ryan from Sony Interactive. He announces that PlayStation players will get access to DLC 30 days before other platforms. Another Watch Dogs 2 trailer begins. It sounds like the song its set to is Run the Jewels. As a hip hop fan, it sounds like this game's soundtrack is going to be amazing. One thing I like about the game is that it doesn't seem to take itself seriously all the time.
Yves comes back out to talk about a new IP. He says this is extreme sports with an open world. The trailer begins. It shows a bunch of different athletes doing things from skydiving to mountain climbing to snowboarding and skiing. It's called Steep, and it looks pretty cool. I want to play it just for the wing suiting. Rebecka Coutaz and Igor Manceau come out to talk about the game. The game's set in the Alps, spanning many countries. The demo starts off with a skydiver landing atop a peak and taking in the breathtaking scenery. Now he's dropped off to do some wingsuiting. Having played so much Just Cause 3, I REALLY want to play this! He threaded the eye of the needle. Wow, it's moving pretty fast. One of his friends just wiped out, looking pretty painful. Now they've switched to a new character doing some snowboarding. It actually has first person mode, and I'm watching someone ski now. That looked crazy! Hehe, there was a scene where they showed a wingsuiter bang into a church bell. That was hilarious! It comes out this December.
Aisha Tyler brings everyone out to the stage to say goodbye.
So, I have to say Aisha Tyler didn't really bother me much this year. Overall, I liked the conference, and I was also surprised by the fact that they didn't end it with Watch Dogs 2, but with Steep instead. Man, I actually really am taken aback with Steep because of just how open and fun it looks, especially the wingsuiting. And what I'm most excited about is the new South Park game. Rarely does E3 get me to preorder a game, but I preordered it the moment I saw it in action. Nice work Ubisoft.
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